confession london
REFRESH. HISTORY. MEMORABLE. IMPORTANT.

CONFESSION TIME: and she was begging for thread.



He looked at me while the song played. Looked at me and asked me if it was the right one. The one on my mind. I let myself sink deeper into his fluffy couch pillows and nodded. It wasn't. It wasn't the one on my mind. But this one felt so much more appropriated. I wasn't drowning anymore.
I was begging for thread.


It feels like it was yesterday that I sat on this comfy grey couch, drank some apple cider and tried to keep bugs from getting into the apartment after a long day at the beach. It was hot, it was always hot there. I lost my luggage on the way but realized soon that I didn't need more than a bathing suit and a beach dress that was just long enough to get away with it at a bar.
I realized that I don't need much to be happy. To feel like I'm at the right spot where I need to be. Where I should be.

Since I'm back in europe, it has been overwhelming. Confusing.
Instead of feeling even clearer about what I want and where I belong I'm even more begging for thread.

People tell you that you find yourself at your travels, in a place you've never been before. I didn't find myself.
I learned things I already knew, I remembered details I should've never forgotten and in the end it brings me back to a little girls dream. To her own fairytale that she had in her little blonde head all along and just kind of forgot along the way. She got distracted, the world took her over, ripped everything apart that she believed in. Since then she's been trying, searching, fighting. But in the end it comes all down to her dream of freedom and love, some feathers in her hair, a pony by her side and a cowboy who can keep her warm at night. Because I don't need much to be happy. I never did. And all the little blonde girl ever wanted was to be happy.
15.10.14 20:04
 


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