confession london
REFRESH. HISTORY. MEMORABLE. IMPORTANT.

CONFESSION TIME: let's be strangers.



YOU WANT TO BE SO MANY THINGS. I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU WOULD SETTLE DOWN ONE DAY AND BE OKAY WITH JUST BEING WHO YOU ARE. [...]
BUT MAYBE WANTING TO BE SO MANY THINGS, IS JUST WHO YOU ARE.
-pleasefindthis

He looked straight at me with his big blue eyes. Asked me what my big plan was. My goals for the next ten years. My career plan, my bright future.

And I told him that I will always be okay. That I will always find a job. That I don't care about risks. That I'm not afraid of the unknown. That all I want is to be happy, to love what I do and see the world. That I want to meet new people and try things I've never done before. That I don't want to visit places, I want to live there. That I want to take every impression in and look at the sun from every corner of this beautiful world.

He shook his head. Laughed a bit. Told me that he's all about minimizing risks and playing it safe. That he follows his plans and reaches his career goals right in time. That he works for the same company since 10 years. That he plans his vacation one year ahead and already knows his dinner schedule for the next week.

And he knew what he had to do right now. It was this second in silence after all the months worth of trying and heartbreak and tears that we looked each other in the eyes and truly realized that we would never be together. That it would never be enough. Enough of what we need to be happy.
There was nothing left to be said, nothing left to talk about. And I knew his kiss was good bye. And the next time our paths would cross it would be as strangers. Strangers that once loved. Strangers that may feel the same sun burning on their skin but never look at it in the same way.
30.11.14 15:47
 


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